Dave Barry

Dave Barry

Dave Barry’s 2016 Holiday Gift Guide

Dave Barry shares his 2016 Holiday Gift Guide. Christmas presents include gag gifts like a cockroach pool float, Poop Like a Champion Cereal, and the Oktoberfist Drinking Glove. What will Santa Claus bring you?

Dave Barry

The tile that binds

Today's topic for homeowners is: how to install a tile floor. Any home decorator will tell you that there is nothing quite like a tile floor for transforming an ordinary room into an ordinary room that has tile on the floor. But if you're like most homeowners, you think that laying tile is a job for the ''pros.'' Boy, are you ever stupid! Because the truth is that anybody can do it! All it takes is a little planning, the right materials and a Fire Rescue unit.

Dave Barry

Classic '96: Fire in the belly

So I went to the U.S. Open tennis tournament, which is a big tennis event in New York City, which by the way has gotten much nicer. I say this because, as I was getting out of a taxi, I was startled by the sound of a woman's voice, coming from somewhere behind me, saying something like, ''Please check for your personal belongings!''

Dave Barry

NIGHT OF THE LIVING CHOCOLATE

I love Halloween. It reminds me of my happy childhood days as a student at Wampus Elementary School in Armonk, N.Y., when we youngsters used to celebrate Halloween by making decorations out of construction paper and that white paste that you could eat.

Dave Barry Gift Guide

Dave Barry's 2016 Holiday Gift Guide

The challenge, in this hectic season, is always to find enough unnecessary things for all the people on our gift list. That’s where this Holiday Gift Guide comes in. We sincerely believe that you will not find a collection of products this useless anywhere else. These are all real products; we did not make them up. You can actually buy them. – Dave Barry

About Dave Barry

Dave Barry

@rayadverb

Dave Barry has been at the Herald since 1983. A Pulitzer Prize winner for commentary, he writes about everything from the international economy to exploding toilets.

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Dave Barry's 2016 Holiday Gift Guide

The challenge, in this hectic season, is always to find enough unnecessary things for all the people on our gift list. That’s where this Holiday Gift Guide comes in. We sincerely believe that you will not find a collection of products this useless anywhere else. These are all real products; we did not make them up. You can actually buy them. – Dave Barry
Justin Azpiazu
Dave Barry's 2016 Holiday Gift Guide 5:48

Dave Barry's 2016 Holiday Gift Guide

Video: Dave Barry goes searching for protesters on the campaign trail 1:38

Video: Dave Barry goes searching for protesters on the campaign trail

Josh Richardson returns to Heat and can't wait for others to do same 2:05

Josh Richardson returns to Heat and can't wait for others to do same

Heat PG Goran Dragic looking forward to return home 2:09

Heat PG Goran Dragic looking forward to return home