Miami-Dade County

‘Rain is kryptonite to Miami drivers.’ There’s no saving us from stupidity on the road

Miami, you were warned.

For days, TV forecasters breathlessly told us we were finally going to get some much-needed rain. They didn’t candy coat the warnings, either — that one to three inches would fall Tuesday into Wednesday.

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The National Weather Service’s thumbnail pictures for Tuesday and Wednesday look like someone spilled black ink on the National Weather Service forecast site. Precipitation chance on Tuesday: It’s now 100 percent. Winds could be gusting as high as 36 mph — which is about 10 mph faster than you were driving on Florida’s Turnpike, Interstate 95 or surface roads in many spots in South Florida.

Tonight: 100 percent.

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National Weather Service’s weather forecast for March 19-20, 2019. National Weather Service Miami

And judging by people’s comments on a Reddit post after Tuesday morning’s (not-so) rush hour, we’re already 100 percent fed up.

State Road “836 is a parking lot. I thought there was an accident. Nope, just light rain,” a Reddit reader posted.

“It was a fun drive this morning,” a Reddit post starts out and you’re sure “Hunterangel121” is being sarcastic because as the rain picked up on the Palmetto, “I counted 6 cars with hazards and no headlights.”

Yep. We do that in Miami. A little rain falls and on go the flashers — which is illegal. And stupid. But we champion stupid here on the roads.

“Don’t forget to turn your hazard lights on for absolutely no reason!!” a Reddit reader counsels — double exclamation points intended.

“But definitely leave your headlights off,” responded someone with a dash of South Florida snark.

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This is a parking lot in the rain in Doral, Florida on March 19, 2019. But it could also be Florida’s Turnpike or Interstate 95 or the Palmetto at any point during the day as rain chance is 100 percent, according to the National Weather Service. And we all know what rain does to traffic flow. It doesn’t go. Howard Cohen hcohen@miamiherald.com

Hard to argue with this point of view:

“What gets me the most is all these people who can’t find their turn signal to save their life can somehow manage to work their hazard flashers at the first hint of moisture on their windshield.”

Or this one:

“People can’t drive in sunny weather. How could you expect them to drive like normal people now?”

There’s a reason for this South Florida peculiarity, a Reddit poster explains:

“Rain is the kryptonite to Miami drivers.”

The shaft of light in all of this gloom is that the deluge will be relatively short-lived.

The National Weather Service says the rain will depart Wednesday afternoon, where chances are just 40 percent. Expect a glorious weekend with highs around 74 degrees and lows at 65 degrees and only a 20 percent chance of rain Friday to Sunday.

Just perfect for the Spring Break crowd. But ah, that’s another story ...

Miami Herald Real Time/Breaking News reporter Howard Cohen, a 2017 Media Excellence Awards winner, has covered pop music, theater, health and fitness, obituaries, municipal government and general assignment. He started his career in the Features department at the Miami Herald in 1991.
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