We rated Kendall’s greatest strip malls. Because it needed to be done.

Some people think Kendall is a suburban wasteland of strip malls. To that we say, And?

Strip malls are amazing. There’s ample parking (usually). There is a random assortment of vendors and service providers. (Where else can you get your taxes done AND buy a Publix chicken tender sub?) They’re plentiful.

So in order to dispense with all the shade people throw at Kendall, we are going to show you why Kendall wins at strip malls.

Kendall Village Center

This plaza has a GENUINE Romero Britto statue. Also, it has a Chuck E. Cheese’s. Kendall hotties flock to the L.A. Fitness and Bahama Breeze is the place to be for happy hour.

Does it have a Publix: No. But it has a Pier 1 and those are amazing.

Rating: (three out of five stars). Bonus points for having a movie theater, like a real mall. Points deducted for having a Chuck E. Cheese’s.

8659 SW 124th Ave, Miami

Shops of Kendall

You pass this plaza all the time and you don’t even know it exists, which is the best kind of Kendall plaza. It’s full of hidden gems! We can’t name any of them, but they are there for you to discover.

Does it have a Publix: No, but it has a Sleep Number store.

Rating: (three out of five stars). Bonus for having a Lime Fresh, Anthony’s Coal Fired Pizza and a Firehouse Subs.

12500 SW 88th St, Miami

The Palms at Town & Country

Let’s just clear one thing up, friends. Town & Country is not a “mall.” It is a strip mall on steroids. That said, it has everything you could ever need, including Blue Martini, which is where Kendallites come to get inappropriate.

Does it have a Publix: YES! And a Total Wine. This place is heaven on earth.

Rating: (five out of five stars). We live in that Nordstrom Rack.

8268 Mills Dr., Miami

Kendale Lakes Center

Oh, so you think you’re too good to hang out at Dandy Bear? You are NOT. This plaza also has a Hobby Lobby. We don’t really know what is in Hobby Lobby.

Does it have a Publix: No. But it has a Dr. Limon Peruvian restaurant, which is fine dining as far as we are concerned.

Rating: (three out of five stars). Bonus points for having a Miami Subs Grill, because that’s still a thing we all need.

Kendall and 137th Avenue

Kendall Place

A dentist, a Party City and a Chicken Kitchen? This is Kendall Shang-ri La.

Does it have a Publix: YES! And a Starbucks.

Rating: (two out of five stars) Extra points for having “Kendall” in the name. Points deducted because this strip mall is never not under construction and the parking lot always floods in the rain.

8851 SW 107th Ave, Miami

Dadeland Station

Dadeland Mall was like, “We are too cute for a damn Target.” So Dadeland Station popped up around the corner and piled a bunch of big box stores on top of each other. Technically this is not a strip mall, but spiritually it is.

Does it have a Publix? No. But it has a Michael’s for when we finally learn to knit.

Rating: (two out of five stars) This place triggers flashbacks from Black Fridays past, which is the stuff of nightmares.

8312 S Dixie Hwy, Miami

London Square

You’ve never heard of this plaza because you don’t live in West Kendall, but this place is poppin’ because it has a Home Goods AND a Party City.

Does it have a Publix: No, but it has a damn Misha’s Cupcakes. If you don’t know what Misha’s Cupcakes means, we can’t even speak.

Rating: (three out of five stars). Getting into this plaza is a slog because everyone wants that cheap CostCo gas.

13550 SW 120th St, Miami

This story was originally published October 29, 2018 at 7:10 AM.