New home may not be homey but it beats homeless shelter for mom and 2 sons
The apartment overlooks a gas station lit up like Times Square and the noisy on-ramp of West Okeechobee Road. To the north lies a cement factory; to the south, a diesel truck repair shop; to the west concrete block and brick paver manufacturers.
The apartment is located in the tiny town of Medley, which has nearly twice as many industrial businesses — 1,900 — as people — 1,056.
The living room is bare and empty aside from two beanbag chairs, an ottoman and a TV that hasn’t been hooked up.
This place is home for Fabiola Bodkin and her two sons, Ethan, 14, and Liam, 13, who moved in last month. It may not be homey yet, but it’s got potential. It beats the homeless shelter, one-bed Julia Motel room and Bodkin’s 2016 Jeep Patriot, which all served as temporary dwellings for the family since they were evicted from their Hialeah apartment seven months ago.
They are thankful to have two bedrooms, and two beds (Bodkin still sleeps on the floor), a full bathroom, a real kitchen. Tired of being nomads, they can make a home here.
“What a relief to have a roof over our heads and food on the table — well, we don’t have a table, but we’ve got a counter!” Bodkin said, adding that she needs to find barstools so they can sit at the counter and not on the floor.
“The motel room felt like a prison cell, and the constant uncertainty about where we would move next caused all of us a lot of anxiety and depression.”
Teens, one severely autistic, needed stability
First month’s rent of $2,200 and a security deposit were paid by the Chapman Partnership, whose housing specialists helped Bodkin secure the apartment and a vital sense of stability for Ethan, who is severely autistic.
“All children — and especially special-needs children — must have a routine,” Bodkin said. “It’s psychologically damaging for them to live in limbo. Why bother finishing assignments or start a swimming class if you are scared you’ll be packing up and moving again? They don’t learn how to trust. They don’t develop self-confidence.
“I went through this with my own mother. I want to break that cycle. I want my kids to have a childhood.”
Bodkin, 50, was born in Haiti and grew up in North Miami, graduating from Edison High School. She and her brother lived with their single mom, who worked at a hat factory and as a security guard. Bodkin wanted to be an attorney, but there was no money for college. She worked as a security guard, traffic school clerk, customer service representative for BellSouth, American Express, Florida Blue and Aetna.
Bodkin’s mother, who helped care for the boys, died of cancer in 2023. Since then, it’s been a struggle for Bodkin, a single mother who receives no child support.
“Ethan needed therapy and close supervision. He would run off all the time,” Bodkin said. “I couldn’t afford childcare. I missed work. I fell behind on rent. I took payday loans out of desperation, and every two weeks they were subtracting $300.”
Then came the eviction notice and a series of moves. Bodkin feared they would end up on the street.
“I was having panic attacks., and pain from a herniated disk in my neck and left arm,” she said. “Liam was having migraine headaches. Ethan regressed. He had accidents in bed.”
“He got aggressive. He pinches and scratches. We have marks,” she said, as she and Liam showed bruises and cuts on their arms. “I was afraid to hug him for a while. I couldn’t go to Publix or the laundromat or anywhere in public with him because he would get upset.”
Liam and Ethan appeared to be brave and resilient but they were hurting, Bodkin said. They also went through a growth spurt that made them harder to handle. They are each about 6-1 and 300 pounds.
“We’ve been crammed in like sardines and these are very big boys,” she said. “Ethan would get overwhelmed. Liam would stay awake all night to watch over us. I cried every day. For Liam’s 13th birthday we had no cake, no gifts. He said, ‘Mom, it’s not your fault,’ but it is.”
Bodkin thought about moving to Georgia, where housing is more affordable, but she did not want to take Ethan out of his school, the South Florida Autism Charter School at its main campus in Hialeah. School founder Tamara Moodie and its teachers have been anchors in Ethan’s life since he was 5 years old.
“Everybody loves Ethan. They call him the gentle giant,” Bodkin said. “He’s made so much progress. Dr. Moodie is a champion of those kids. She always answers when you call.
“I never expected Ethan to get out of diapers or say a sentence. He can say ‘I love you’ and some words now, like mama. Mostly he echoes what he hears.”
‘Don’t put autistic kids in a bucket’
Bodkin hopes Ethan will graduate in four years and enter the school’s post-graduate program for 18- to 22-year-olds.
“He was nonverbal when he started, and it has been wonderful to see him grow up and learn new things,” said Shalean Ghitis, a social worker at the school who nominated the family for the Miami Herald’s annual Wish Book. “We accept and nurture the kids other schools don’t want. And we’re proud to be a model for other states as the first school of its kind in Florida.”
Acceptance is the key to understanding children with autism and enabling them to thrive, Bodkin said.
“Don’t put autistic kids in a bucket. No two are the same,” Bodkin said. “What they are saying is, accept me as I am. They are not broken clocks. Don’t try to fix them.
“There is so much misinformation that people are swallowing. It’s not Tylenol’s fault, it’s not the parents’ fault, it’s not the child’s fault. People with autism are not brain-damaged. They may be smarter than you. Talk to them.”
“Ethan is different,” Liam said. “He thinks differently. He sees things differently. He’s in a different universe. But you can have a relationship with him. It’s kind of weird. That’s OK.”
Liam, often responsible for looking after his older brother, was seriously ill with COVID during the pandemic and still suffers from migraines. While the family was moving around, Liam had to change schools so Bodkin decided to place him in online school. Now that they are settled, she wants to enroll him in middle school where he could excel in his favorite subject — science — and get him involved in activities, like basketball, self-defense and coding classes.
Bodkin and her boys are finding their groove in the new apartment, which represents structure and permanence. She got her job back as a customer service rep for a health insurance company. Ethan is less irritable. Liam feels safe.
You could say they are home for the holidays. To make the unfurnished apartment more comfortable, they could use a sectional sofa, three dressers, three barstools, a desk, a bookshelf and lamps. A portable dishwasher would be useful, as would a laptop computer. Bodkin always needs repairs to her Jeep given the many miles she logs transporting Ethan to school and appointments. She would also be grateful for financial aid for Ethan to attend special camps and therapy sessions at the South Florida Autism Charter School.
HOW TO HELP
To help this Wish Book nominee and more than 150 others who are in need this year:
▪ To donate, use the coupon found in the newspaper or pay securely online through www.MiamiHerald.com/wishbook
▪ For more information, call 305-376-2906 or email Wishbook@MiamiHerald.com
▪To help this Wish Book nominee and more than 150 others who are in need this year:
▪ Read all Wish Book stories on www.MiamiHerald.com/wishbook
