Samuel L. Gay Jr.: 81, soldier, educator, loving husband and master of barbecue ribs

This story is part of an ongoing Miami Herald series chronicling the lives of South Florida COVID-19 victims.

Samuel L. Gay Jr. would do anything for his wife and family. Anything.

He was 81 years old when he died April 19 due to complications from COVID-19. He was born, the second of five siblings, in Miami on Nov. 15, 1938.

“He was very family oriented,” said his daughter, Joni Waters. “He always wanted to get the family together for different activities, like holidays and celebrations.”

Gay went to college at Tuskegee University in Alabama, where he got a bachelor’s degree in physical education and a master’s in education.

He served in the U.S. Army during the early ‘60s. Stationed in several places including Georgia and Virginia, he was commissioned as a second lieutenant and assigned to the Army Corps of Engineers. He later became a paratrooper and ultimately attained the rank of captain, according to Waters.

In 1962, he married his college sweetheart, Eleanor Gay. They had a pair of twins, John and Joni, and were married for 58 years.

“There’s nothing that he would not do for her,” said Waters. “If it was Valentine’s Day, birthday; there was never a year or a time when he did not celebrate her on those holidays. And as my mom and I talked, she can’t even recall them ever having a major disagreement.”

In 1963, after his years of active duty, he started teaching physical education at Lillie C. Evans Elementary School in Miami. He remained in the Army Reserves for six years and was honorably discharged in 1970.

He also worked as a school counselor and assistant principal at Robert E. Lee Junior High School, and as principal at George Washington Carver Middle School.

Waters recalls her dad’s time at the middle school as the highlight of his career.

“That was because he really had an opportunity to meet with kids,” she said. “The kids loved him; the parents loved him.”

Carver became a blue-ribbon school during Gay’s time as principal, she added.

Gay retired from the school in the mid-’90s after working 30 years for the Miami-Dade public school system. But, he didn’t stop working for long. He went on to work for the school board and eventually became director of alternative education. He finally retired after more than 45 years as an educator.

Gay was as passionate about his church, fraternity and family as he was about teaching children.

His father, Rev. Samuel L. Gay Sr., was a pastor who built the Allen Chapel African Methodist Episcopal Church in Miami. Gay was a faithful member of the church and always sentimental about the building.

He was also an active member of Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity, Inc., the first African American fraternity. He served as president, held other officer positions, and remained an active member for almost 60 years.

His favorite holiday was Christmas, and he always tried to get the family together for a big dinner that would include his family and friends. Sometimes there would be about 50 people.

“It didn’t even have to be a holiday,” said Waters. “We’d meet just any time we could get together to share a laugh. He always wanted that to happen, especially around Christmas.”

Gay will also be remembered for his love of shopping, dressing nicely, cooking and taking pictures. He never went out without shining his shoes, and he made barbecue that his grandchildren loved.

“Nobody could do his ribs the way he did,” said his wife, Eleanor. “They were restaurant quality.”

His love of pictures has now become a source of joy and a lasting memory for his family.

“Sometimes he would be taking so many that we’d be like, ‘All right already, enough with the pictures!’” said Joni. “But now we have them to look back on. So, I’m so thankful he was the way he was when it came to taking pictures.”

Gay went to the doctor on April 4 after showing symptoms of COVID-19. He was put on a ventilator days later and spent two weeks in the hospital. He died April 19.

He will be missed by his wife, daughter and son, grandchildren, siblings, relatives and friends. Due to the pandemic, they weren’t able to have a funeral or conventional viewing.

Waters says she will remember her father as a man who lived his life to the fullest.

“I know he’s in Heaven having a great time,” said Joni. “Because he lived life as a man should.”

Alejandra Marquez Janse, a Florida International University journalism student, wrote this story for the Miami Herald.