‘Please add a croqueta to my steak sandwich’: Miami gets weird on Uber Eats
Miami can be pretty basic about food delivery.
In Miami, our most popular order is not exotic, according to a new study. It’s cheeseburgers (with pickles, as is sensible). We also order chicken chop-chop with yellow rice, and we order pepperoni pizza because it is life-giving if not terribly original. Also, we apparently don’t know how to make coffee, because the delivery of lattes with two percent milk and cafe con leches with regular milk is highly desirable.
Yes. Two of our top five most popular food delivery orders involve coffee. We could just buy an espresso maker but that would require a lot of work, like clicking the mouse.
All of this vital information comes courtesy of a study by Uber Eats, the food delivery app that — like every other food delivery app on the planet — has become a lifeline during Restaurant COVID-19 Quarantine Rounds 1 and 2.
Uber Eats has released its second annual Uber Eats Cravings Report, which compiles information on the thousands of orders that come in from around the country. Strangely, Miami does not stand out most of the time. The most popular special request here is “No onion,” which is the most popular request across the United States. Other popular directions: we want it well done; with extra side sauce; spicy and with no tomato.
Clearly, Miami does not like interfering vegetables.
But we’re not that fussy, at least. Diners in Connecticut, Georgia, New Jersey, Tennessee and Nevada have the most special requests, Uber Eats reports.
We are not the nicest customers, either, which should come as a shock to approximately no one. The most “pleases” and “thank yous” come from Montana, Vermont, Oregon, Idaho and Washington. Where are your manners? Your mother is ashamed of you.
But when we do get down to the special requests, we get a little weird. Here are a few of the gems coming from Miami diners:
- “Would you please put some of the chocolate crunchies on the bottom of the cup, then some in the middle of the cup, and the rest on top?” Would you like ice cream with that or just some more crunchies?
- “Extra ice cream please. Stay safe, don’t talk to strangers, don’t close, keep making ice cream, you guys are awesome.” New rule of life: Always ask for extra ice cream.
- “Please add a croqueta to my steak sandwich.” Honestly? We’re just happy nobody requested a croqueta in his latte.