Wear SPF and keep cheering: A Miami soccer parent’s survival guide

On the sidelines
On the sidelines Miami Shores Soccer Club

Kids’ soccer isn’t just a sport. It’s a lifestyle.

The parents’ job involves waking up at the crack of dawn, driving our little athletes from A to B, setting up our chairs on the sidelines, clapping like crazy, then doing it all over again. Every. Single. Weekend. For. Life. But we wouldn’t have it any other way.

Here’s a survival guide based on an informal straw poll on how the adult cheerleaders stay sane.

We got you. Thanks for the tips, parents.

Get comfortable

Invest in a good chair, one that can fold easily like an umbrella and fit in your hot mess of a trunk. For the love of all that is holy: Shell out a little extra for a chair that has the canopy attached. It’s never not going to rain and the sun will never not sear your skin.

Stay charged

Since you will be nowhere near a wall socket for hours, a portable charger is your BFF.

Don’t burn

Protect your rapidly aging skin with SPF of at least 1000. We prefer ones with a little bug repellent — and concealer. Yassss.

App up

So you were born before 1980 and your technology skills aren’t exactly on point. Have your 10 year old show you how to download apps. You’ll need Waze for oh so crucial directions to fields in the middle of nowhere; TeamSnap to scout the competition; and WhatsApp for ranting to other parents about biased refs (and share heartwarming, inspirational moments).

Know the lingo

If you don’t know such crucial terms as “off sides,” “yellow card” and “corner kick,” then you will be an outcast. Try volleyball. We hear there’s air conditioning.

Look cute

Just kidding. You are going to be outside all day. You will look busted. Find a pair of shades that covers your entire face, a hat and some athleisure so you can look like you plan to do yoga later.

soccer chair.PNG
Invest in a good chair when you’re a soccer parent Madeleine Marr
Celebrity/real time news reporter Madeleine Marr has been with The Miami Herald since 2003. She has covered such features as travel, fashion and food. In 2007, she helped launch the newspaper’s daily People Page, attending red carpet events, awards ceremonies and press junkets; interviewing some of the biggest names in show business; and hosting her own online show. She is originally from New York City and has two daughters.