The Cuban Stick Mop is the single greatest mop in the world. This is not hyperbole.

For those who don’t know, this is a photo of the Cuban Stick Mop, or as abuelas everywhere call it, el palo de trapear.

This item is the preferred cleaning tool in the Caribbean and Miami. It is so ubiquitous in Miami that even Amazon calls it the Cuban Wood Mop Stick. That sounds dumb, so we are going to call it the Cuban Stick Mop.

Here’s how it works: You take a wet rag. Use the stick to move the wet rag across the floor.

I personally take it to the next level by cutting a hole right in the center of my rag and threading it through the stick in the middle. When you are done cleaning, your house smells like Fabuloso, and you throw the dirty rag in the washer.

Now that you know how it works, I will explain why it is better than all the other mops of the world.

1. The Swiffer

This is great if you want to push your dirt across the floor in a straight line.

The Swiffer is some nonsense invented by a person who thought it would be smart to clean the floor with a maxi pad at the end of a stick.

2. String Mop

The String Mop reminds me of grade school.

This mop is great if you love finding bits of string stuck in your baseboards.

3. Microfiber spin mop

They call this the Magic Spin Mop. It magically takes all your money.

Look, this mop comes with THREE microfiber heads. But what happens when they all get gross? You gotta order more until this mop manufacturer goes out of business. You know what I do when I can’t use my rag on my Cuban Stick Mop anymore? I cut an old towel into four pieces, and then I have four more rags.

4. Sponge Mop

There are people who use the Sponge Mop and then there are people who really want to clean their floor.

If you grew up in the Midwest, you are familiar with this abomination. I have never seen one of these in Miami.

5. Wonder Mop

What is so wonderful about the Libman Wonder Mop? Not a damn thing.

This was inspired by those gas station car wash machines.

6. Hot Steam Mop

Steam Mops are for suckers.

If you own one of these you fit into one of the following two scenarios:

1) You have a cleaning lady who has to deal with this ridiculous machine so you don’t even think about it.

2) You bought it because you were watching TV at four in the morning and saw a really convincing infomercial. It is deep inside your closet, not being used because the Cuban Stick Mop is superior.