Anybody remember Rock ’Em Sock ’Em Robots? That was a favorite toy of my early youth, and for some reason I thought of the Red Rocker and Blue Bomber in the yellow boxing ring the other night when Miami’s sporting heavyweights — the Dolphins and Heat — were going head to head.
It’s pretty rare when our traditional flagship franchise and our currently reigning king club share a stage, but it happened Thursday night when the Dolphins’ No. 1 pick in the NFL Draft and a Heat home playoff game battled for attention.
Dolphins first round vs. Heat second round in an epic duel to answer, “Whose town is this, anyway?”
There is not an easy or correct answer, but what-have-you-done-for-us-lately might come into play. LeBron James, who has led the Heat to consecutive championships, happens to be set for a starring role in an upcoming Judd Apatow film called Trainwreck. The phrase unfortunately describes the state of the Dolphins as starving fans await the club’s first playoff victory since 2000.
With that disparity in mind, I found it funny that the Dolphins’ top pick Thursday, 19th overall, happened to be a Tennessee offensive tackle named Ja’Wuan James.
I kept waiting for new general manager Dennis Hickey to explain the choice by saying, “Well, our strategy all along was to take a player with a name as close to LeBron James as possible, and so Ja’Wuan James topped our draft board. We hope the similarity is an indicator we have just drafted a future Hall of Famer.”
In turn, as a gesture of magnanimous goodwill, I think it would be fitting if LeBron began spelling his first name La’Bruan.
Roy Denzil Hibbert
Kevin Durant’s Donald Sterling
Fredi Gonzalez Jeffrey Loria
Parting thought: Chris “Birdman” Andersen Brick In Yo Face Frank Sinatra’s Summer Wind
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