Dear everybody in South Florida: Please stop hanging from moving vehicles

Every time you turn around, someone new in South Florida is hanging off a moving vehicle – and getting caught on video.

Why this seems to happen so much in South Florida remains a mystery. We haven’t seen it in Portland or Omaha or Charlotte. Is it the heat? The humidity? We can’t even rely on our usual excuse (“because Miami”) because the latest incident happened in Broward.

Here’s what went down on the roads of Broward, captured by Chris Martin and posted on his Facebook page:

Wtf goin on in broward

Posted by Chris Martin on Monday, July 23, 2018

Yes. That man is hanging on to the back of a Broward County Transit bus driving along Route 60. According to the Sun Sentinel, the route runs between Broward Central Terminal and 441 and Northwest 15th Street.

Why does someone jump on the back of a bus? Because it is there.

This gentleman joins two other recent car-hood joyriders (although we can’t imagine there’s much joy in riding on a speeding vehicle in this heat).

Back in June there was this guy, clinging to the hood of a car in the express lanes of I-95:

We had some theories about why he was doing this. But it turns out the event was a domestic spat gone awry. Way awry. Driver Patresha Isidore, who said she wanted to take the car to pick up her daughter when her boyfriend didn’t want her to, was charged with culpable negligence and exposure to harm for driving off with ex Junior Francis on the hood.

Then there was this guy, also clinging to a car hood:

We really have no idea what’s going on here. But people, please be responsible. You are adults. You are not on spring break. It’s never a bad idea to keep your feet on the ground.