Dave Barry Gift Guide

Zombie Yard Sculpture

Zombie Yard Sculpture
Zombie Yard Sculpture

$89.95 plus shipping and handling from Design Toscano, 1400 Morse Ave., Elk Grove Village, Ill. 60007, 800-525-5141, www.designtoscano.com

Suggested by Derrik Filippo

This is the gift for people who are tired of old boring traditional yard ornaments depicting gentle woodland creatures such as deer. This sculpture depicts a highly realistic zombie who is climbing out of the earth to chow down on human flesh. Putting this sculpture in your front yard is an excellent way to let visitors know that you are either a really fun person or a psychopath.

The beauty of the zombie yard sculpture is that it's portable, so you can easily move it to any location that you feel needs to have an emerging zombie. A children's playground or a restaurant salad bar are two examples that come immediately to mind. You could also have a LOT of fun at a funeral.