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A Mom's iWish Apps

I recently had lunch with a bunch of MFFNs (mom friends for now) and, before long, we had whipped out our iPhones to compare applications. Sharing the latest apps is now the social equivalent to seeking advice on schools or babysitters. It's taken the iTunes app store awhile to catch on that tech-mamas are probably the customers with the greatest growth potential. What other demographic multitasks as much? Or could use more help?

Still, the number of mom-friendly apps is pitifully poor. Sure, there's the Baby Monitor, which turns your iPhone into a baby monitor so you know when the little one is awake. And BabyTracker, a tool that lets you log the shapes, colors and forms of your baby's daily dumps. (Word of advice: Keep this one on a separate page from the recipe apps.)

There's even the new Email n' Walk, which allows a mom to type out an email and watch where she's walking or driving at the same time. (Store that one with the other amusing-yet-useless tools like the burp and fart apps.) And there's my favorite of all, Lightsaber Unleashed, which allows you to swing your iPhone around like a Lightsaber. (Every cool mom needs one.)

But where are the apps we really need? The app developers should consider what a mom wants:

1. An app that tracks how long you've been out on date night and automatically calculates how much you owe the babysitter when you finally stumble home and have trouble multiplying hours x $10 bills on your fingers.

2. An app that researches all the public and private schools, magnet programs, charter schools and choice schools, and tells you which one is the best for your child (and how to get in).

3. An app that comes up with something new to pack in your kid's lunch every morning.

4. An app that sends electric shock waves through your husband when he starts to think about another woman.

5. An app that provides an answer to some of those killer kid questions like "Mom, did you ever smoke pot?"

6. An app that gets your kids to clean their rooms, go to bed on time, get their elbows off the table, say "please," and get their homework done. Oh wait, this one has been created. It's called Nag Mobile. (Honest, look it up.)

7. An app that sends electric shock waves through your husband when he starts to snore.

8. An app that finally tells the truth to the question, "Does this outfit make my butt look big?"

9. An app that answers the phone when your mother-in-law calls and carries on a pleasant conversation. (I, of course, don't need this because I adore my MIL.)

10. An app that sends electric shock waves through your husband when he forgets your birthday, wedding anniversary, and to take out the trash.