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I am Sick! But I am fine. Really I am.

If I were a man I'd be in bed moaning. But I'm a mom so I have to be sunshine and roses and pretend nothing much is wrong. As a single mom, i don't have anyone to complain to anyway. Remember when your mom got so fed up she said "I don't want to hear it, talk to the wall." Well that's what I do, and it is/was more helpful then complaining either to my ex. The wall doesn't try to one up me with maladies. If I had a cold, he had tuberculosis; if I had a headache, he had a brain tumor.

And I see it's not just my ex who was afflicted with this man disease, I can see it repeating itself all over the Facebook feeds.

Besides, I prefer suffering alone.

When sick, I never complain to my daughter beyond, "Please stop banging the pots against the cat. I am not feeling up to it."

My child is yet too young to make healing chicken soup or masking gin & tonics.

Then I'll feed her, bathe her, help her pick clothes for tomorrow, make her lunch, read her two books and say our prayers. Then it's my time after I feed and soothe the cat. I can do some work or pamper myself.

Work always wins out.

Rather than feed a cold, I'm ignoring it, and so is the cat on my lap who apparently doesn't mind that my nose is dripping on his fur.

I went to work today and a parent-teacher conference. If a dragon needed slaying I'd do it. I'll be up at 6 tomorrow starting another day. I can't afford to miss a day of work. I need to hoard the days in case she gets sick. Or the cat gets sick. Or the car/internet gets sick.

Mother, heal thyself.

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