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Exploiting my Baby for Personal Gain

It’s so easy to write about my child, her mistakes, her poops, her ballet, but does she want me to do it? Does she want what I have to say out there, unable to ever be taken back?

This is a question I constantly wrestle with every time I start a blog. There’s just so much humor in the things she does and, as a writer, I sure want to write. But, as a concerned protective mother, I want to protect. I'm concerned she won’t find it funny if she does decide to go into politics someday or wants to live with J.D Salinger mystique. What if she wants to reinvent herself for the stage, telling people she was born to a prostitute in Vegas for the shock value, or seek pity for some egregious act like Jesse James did by blaming his father for making him cheat on his wife with that ex-Amish, neo-nazi, tattooed model? Sure use me as your pity card, if it makes your life better. Mom as The Giving Tree. Personally, I’d feel more comfortable on the defensive, than the offensive. I’d admit to whatever she says and try to get me a reality show.

But is it fair for me to mine her life for humor when I’d hate if my mom had done this to me? My mom's only "communication" was the phone and that was before the party line.

I’d never want to be the next Julie Myerson, either. This mom was internationally denounced as” cruel, selfish and manipulative for writing about her teenage son’s descent into drug addiction” in her memoir “The Lost Child: A Mother’s Story.” I can’t even envy that she hit the best-seller charts, not when her written about son denounces her as “insane and obscene.” That's quite a permanent unhappy ending.

Writing about my daughter is not like when I write about boyfriends, ex-boyfriends, an ex-husband, and an ex-therapist, who I’ll never see again. They deserve to be written about and made fun of anyway.

I feel the same privacy about pictures. I hated pictures of me in junior high but luckily, that was between me, my family, and some sticky paged photo albums now moulding in the garage. And they still are. Now the proud parents put it all out there on Facebook, on MySpace, on 100,000 photosites, regardless of privacy laws that change like the tides. Once unburied, your naked butt bathtub photos will be permanently exposed.

Now the parents go for the laughs when they take the photos and send out the birth announcements. it's all about entertainment, children as the props in the soap opera of their lives.

Is it too late to sign my blogs “anonymous”?