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A Common Lament. The Diet.

I have joined the dozens millions of other moms who want to go on a diet but have infinite excuses. Right now I'm at the trying to strike the flame of willpower stage. In other words, a pre-diet stage. I am working with a damp match. With my usual productive procrastination, I've been researching what has worked for other women. I am now eating cheese, discouraged that I can't melt the weight off by thinking about it. Also that it takes a long time unless you're a Hollywood celebrity who can afford a personal trainer, a chef who specializes in kale, a gig on Dancing with the Starts, and putting your life on pause for a few months.

Pause means you don't have to get up every morning, get you and your child ready, drive 45 minutes to work, work, be cheerful at work, be productive at work and not obsessed with lunchtime, drive home without passing out, take care of your child, be cheerful and pleasant with your child even when your child tests you by eating like a cat with her face in the bowl and she is eating rice with many, many little pieces to pick off the floor, then play, make her lunch, pick clothers with her, read, get her to bed, have a little wind down time before starting your night job, and then doing some writing without being too distracted. That's like one day drawn out into two. If life were fair, I would be able to eat breakfast, lunch and dinner x2 and remain normal sized. I was told it's best to eat many small meals a day, but this is a looong day where no less than 25 small meals will suffice.

I need a two month staycation where nothing is expected of me. I guess I'll be thinner when I win the lottery as an empty nester. I calculate I have a 1 in 35,000,000,000 chance of being thinner.

The single mom I know who is thin teaches yoga for work, so that hardly seems like a fair comparison.

I know sticking to 1000 calories a day works for me. I did that one before successfully. Of course, it was right after I gave birth. There were no half-eaten bowls of Cheerios or cupcakes lying around. And no birthday parties with hard to refuse pizza, cake and pinata droppings. I was also off from work for 3 months.

This musing is no way a plea for work to fire me.

It's me giving me a pep talk.

Well, off to surf the web for some motivational magnets. I hear those work for some people.

I am working my way up to being the role model I know I should be.

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