Remember the good old days, Dolphins fans, when your franchise would confine its embarrassment to traditional ways such as going decades without a Super Bowl appearance and hardly ever even making the playoffs?
Sure there were other small embarrassments along the way, such as Ricky Williams’ abrupt, pot-addled retirement, or wooing Jim Harbaugh while they already had a coach, or the orange carpet, or Cam Cameron — but all of these things now curtsy and bow in a we’re-not-worthy gesture to the reigning embarrassment of the fourth-month Bullygate saga.
The NFL’s long investigation by lawyer Ted Wells finally concluded Friday with a detailed 140-page report that substantiated Jonathan Martin’s claims of sustained bullying by Richie Incognito. But it turns out fellow linemen Mike Pouncey and John Jerry — and even doomed offensive line coach Jim Turner — joined Incognito in the harassment, and that a second young lineman and an assistant trainer were targeted victims along with Martin.
Clearly, though, the report paints Incognito as instigator and ringleader.
Nice guy, this Richie. A real sweetheart.
I just got hold of what I believe to be Incognito’s five-point to-do list for the coming week:
1. Go back on Twitter and continue to claim the truth will bury Martin.
2. Visit nursing homes to taunt ailing residents.
3. “Accidentally” knock over tables of Girl Scout cookies and laugh as scouts dissolve into tears.
4. Attend Special Olympics event to mock competitors.
5. Work on physical conditioning and blocking techniques. Wait. Forget that one. No time.Bob Costas Lauren Tannehill Peyton Manning LeBron James