E very year it gets harder to put on Coconut Grove's King Mango Strut Parade. For instance, this year it was my turn to experience the dreaded post office torture.

Parade organizers are required to get the city of Miami's permission a few months before the annual December event. In the old days I would walk in to the mayor's office and say something like, ''Yo Manny, R U down with this year's Strut?'' and he would say something like, ''U got it, GT.'' Simple.

Now one has to fill out a special events application package. So far mine is 24 pages long and still not complete. Part of it is a ''business notification'' requirement.

Back in the day (this is our 27th year) we would hand every business owner a ''we're having a parade'' letter. Now, you must send certified letters to every property owner near the parade route and to do this -here's where it gets scary -- you must actually go to a post office.

With its long lines and zero parking, no one goes to the Grove office. Last week I took my bundle of letters to Kendall. It may be the only reason to visit Kendall. At 4 p.m on a Monday the Kendall post office had no line and oodles of free parking.

Six uniformed postal clerks stood inside waiting to help me. I chose Carol because she smiled first and handed her my tall stack of letters.

''This may take a while,'' she warned. After it took almost a minute to process the first one I suggested, ``Maybe you could ask the others for help.''

As the other five chatted about gift catalogs and the weather Carol replied, ''Rules don't allow us to share work.'' I asked, ''Why not?'' and she told me it would not be fair to the others waiting in line.

I pointed out that there were no other people in line. Carol was quick to point out that, ''It's rush hour and things could change.'' No one was rushing to this post office as I waited, waited, and waited. Finally Joni took a break from her catalog and offered to help Carol. Pati quickly pointed out that if she did she could get in trouble. That ended that.

I stood and watched. It was torturous. When I occasionally spoke to break the boredom it only slowed Carol down. I asked if I could look at the most-wanted posters to pass the time and got what must be their standard replay, ``We keep it in the back and I think I saw you on it.''

You have time to think in a post office line. Sometimes too much. I imagined the guy who invented UPS. He must have been in a similar situation when he had his Great idea. I thought of the people who had gone postal. Years ago one had been a client of mine.

Finally after what seemed like a month Carol looked up and said, ''All done.'' I traded her $215 for a fat stack of receipts.

She asked, ''Just what were these for?'' I told her they were for a Grove parade called King Mango Strut. Suddenly all of the clerks looked up, smiling again. ''We love your parade,'' Milly said. I lied as I left saying, ``I love your post office.''

BAD DEAL

Last Sunday this paper's Soapbox section ran a letter complaining about my efforts to get the Burn Notice TV production company out of the Coconut Grove Convention Center.

The writer suggested we let them continue to use our waterfront property for next to nothing because the show brings Miami publicity.

I'd like to point out that there are soundstage warehouses all over town that could provide similar facilities without taking up waterfront space slated to become a public park. Allowing Burn Notice to be there continues to be a raw deal for the citizens of Miami.

SUCCESS STORIES

The Grove's oldest business, Maya Hatcha, celebrated its 40th year recently. Owner Vivian Jordan, still a hottie, must have started it when she was 8 years old.

The shop on Grand Avenue has been selling flowing dresses, incense, and buffalo sandals since 1968.

A close second for longevity is Walter's Alters Barbershop down the street. Walter Daniels has worked in the Grove since 1966 and has had his shop for more than 30 years. He does it all, clothing alterations, shoe repairs, and haircuts in his six-chair shop. At 3671 Grand Ave., his prices and services are hard to beat. Mr. Daniels told me, ``I may never have the red corvette I've always dreamed of, but I do a good job taking care of people.''

Glenn Terry is an educator, attorney and activist who lives in Coconut Grove.

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