'Forgotten war' a sad memory for survivors
Posted on Sat, Jun. 28, 2008
BETH REINHARD
breinhard@MiamiHerald.com
T he sour economy makes Iraq seem so 2006. Only 6 percent of South Floridians named the war as a top issue in a Miami Herald poll released this week. ''Iraq fatigue,'' explained pollster John Zogby.
But for Itzhak and Beth Agami of Parkland, whose 25-year-old son Daniel was killed one year ago last Saturday, the war is a constant source of heartache. The cost of gas means little to parents forced to outlive their child.
There have been 4,103 American soldiers killed in Iraq, including 178 from Florida. The Agamis, who tend to finish each other's sentences, sometimes feel like they're the only ones paying attention.
''Nineteen soldiers were killed last month,'' Beth said. ``You tell me how many times you saw that on the news. There's no faces, no pictures, no nothing.''
''It's a forgotten war,'' added Itzhak.
Nearly halfway into 2008, the broadcast networks have shown only 181 weekday minutes of Iraq coverage on the evening newscasts, compared with 1,157 minutes for all of 2007, according to a recent report in The New York Times.
The Agamis don't need Katie Couric to tell them there's a war going on. On the anniversary of Daniel's death, they said a kaddish prayer for him at the Chabad of Parkland and got together for dinner with his friends.
There will be more rituals on the anniversary of his death in the Hebrew calendar, which falls on July 8. The family will light a memorial yartzeit candle and lay rocks on his headstone at the Star of David Memorial Gardens in North Lauderdale. Three days before, they will dedicate a new bimah, the platform for reading the Torah scrolls, at the Chabad of Coral Springs.
''It's a good thing, all these things to remember him by,'' Itzhak said. ``It keeps him alive. . . . The war is not over. People are dying every day.''
Itzhak is from Israel, where everyone serves in the army and everyone feels responsible for the nation's security. In the United States, Iraq feels like someone else's problem, someone else's war.
U.S. Rep. Ron Klein has introduced legislation calling for the Coconut Creek post office to be renamed in honor of Agami. All 25 members of the Florida congressional delegation signed on.
''Don't forget the soldiers,'' Itzhak said. ``Don't forget their sacrifices. Don't forget they every day and every night, they are literally eating dust.''
In pictures, Agami is movie-star handsome, his cheekbones as sculpted as his biceps.
He and four other soldiers died when their tank hit a roadside bomb.
His death, like any death of a loved one, created ripples like stones dropped in a pond. Sgt. Jeff McKinney tried to rescue Agami and the other men trapped in the burning 30-ton vehicle. That was the first of a string of violent incidents that seemed to traumatize McKinney, according to an article in Army Times. Three weeks later, McKinney killed himself, leaving behind his wife, two sons and his parents.
''It's a handicap for the rest of your life, and you have to figure out how to live with it,'' Itzhak said. ``An unseen handicap.''
But peer closely at his face and it looks wrung out with grief.
He and Beth talk of the comfort found in meeting other military families and in receiving cards from strangers.
They have an 8-year-old daughter, Shaina, who is going to camp this summer. Their 24-year-old son, Ilan, and his wife are expecting their first child, right around Daniel's birthday on Jan. 2.
He would have been 27.
Beth Reinhard is the political writer at The Miami Herald.
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