Q:We're a group of retirees who love to read your column. We had a discussion recently: Are things really that different from when we were younger? There's the technology, but isn't the whole point still mostly about the simple thrill of meeting someone and seeing where it goes?

Jim B. and friends

A: Thanks for the note; we love hearing from our youth-challenged readers! As for your theory that relationship concerns span the generations, well, yes and no.

Certain things, of course, are timeless -- a flirtatious glance, a first kiss, that first bad breakup. These are all part of our collective unconscious.

But other things have changed. For example, did you have ''friends with benefits''? This is where two compatible people get together for the sole purpose of sharing Social Security benefits.

Just kidding! It's when two people ''hook up'' (you may know it as ''rolling in the hay'') just for the fun of it with no expectations of a relationship, other than more hay rolling. Then again, back in the day that might have been known as hanging around with a ''loose woman.'' (There were no loose guys, of course, just varsity football players.)

Here are a couple more helpful terminology differences:

`WOOING'

• Then: Courting a young lady.

• Now: An approving cheer yelled at sporting events, or bachelor parties.

`GOING STEADY'

• Then: Dating someone exclusively.

• Now: There is no known modern definition for this term.

The big change, as you mention, has been in technology. Whereas in the past, you might slowly build a relationship with a long phone call every few nights, these days we are blessed with inventions like Twitter and Facebook, upon which you can let your crush know exactly how you're feeling about everything at all times.

It's a godsend! Ask your grandkids about it. You'll be sharing such essential info as ''Jim B. likes this'' before you know it.

Male Call answers questions on etiquette, relationships, men's style and more. Write to malecall@mercurynews.com.

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