Can you pack common sense in the college-bound suitcase, wedged between the extra-long sheets and the pop-up hamper? Does good judgment fit in the shower tote?

Is it possible to fold a prayer in with the hand towels? Surely the bedside lamp I purchase will double as a protective shield.

I'm once again sending a son off to a town where I know no one, and the accompanying jitters cause me to reflect on my parenting and his choices. Sometimes the two have been in conflict, which is fine by me. I long ago surrendered the notion that I had control.

Millions of Americans are preparing for the fall ritual of parting with their young adults. Worry threads their days, but relief is also a steady skein. Even the sturdiest among us need a break from the rigors of parenting. Let's be frank: Sometimes college doesn't come soon enough.

I'm more than ready for my son to leave, for him to make his way in the world and bear the consequences of his actions without motherly intervention. That, after all, is how you grow up. Going away to school, I've long thought, is the safest, surest way for a grown child to be nudged along.

There's nothing quite like doing your own laundry and balancing your first checkbook to recognize that parents are wiser than you gave them credit for. Book learning aside, a campus setting is ideal for practicing life lessons begun in kindergarten like getting along with people, prioritizing tasks, balancing academics with social activities.

Unfortunately, not one of the 118 entries in the College Board's ``Off-to-College Checklist'' deals with the kinds of intangibles that make college a bit more livable. There's no ``Make a Backup of Your Work Every Night'' in the electronics section to go along with the Ethernet card and the surge protector. Likewise, ``Eat Your Fruit and Veggies to Keep Regular'' is missing from the list that suggests Pepto Bismol, Imodium and ibuprofen.

These may sound like trivial lessons, unnecessary reminders better geared for younger children, but experience has taught me that you can't take anything for granted. Case in point: One of my sons didn't wash his sheets until his older sister came to visit and nearly fainted when she caught a whiff of his bed.

``I didn't know I had to!'' he protested.

I suspect this year will prove particularly instructional. Members of the high school class of 2009 graduated into the worst economy since the Great Depression. Ambition has had to make room for practicality; hope has been tempered by uncertainty. The budget for college incidentals -- heck, for college tuition -- has shrunk like a wool sweater in the dryer.

But that may not be all bad. In fact, it's the perfect practicum for his economics class.

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