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VELVET UNDERGROUND

Taking a lesson in the fine art of club life

lank@aol.com

Bar hopping isn't always a bleary-eyed pastime, especially when there's an ample supply of eye candy of the artistic sort we saw at the recent Heineken Art Crawl throughout the Brickell area. But even when there's no art on display, places like Segafredo, Novecento, Piola, Dolores Lolita and Badrutt's Place often give barflies something to look at besides the bottom of their empty glasses. Providing ample distractions of its own in that neighborhood is the newly opened Brickell Irish Pub, where live bands, poker tournaments and karaoke nights are among the planned nightly activities besides the usual Guinness guzzling.

Another one-stop spot for amusement is Crazy Pianos in the Grove, where every Thursday you get two-for-one drafts off the frozen beer taps from 6-10 p.m. Looking for a little intellect with your hops? We hear that Crazy Pianos is the Thursday night spot for those pursuing higher education at the University of Miami Law School.

Those educated in the art -- and it is an art -- of being Single and Fabulous should check out the social group of the same name's Love in White party at 8 p.m. Saturday at The Setai's pool and beach bar. White attire is a must, and tickets are $25, a portion of which benefits Best Buddies Miami. Price includes cocktails and food and entertainment by DJ Johnny the Boy and a live performance by Jean P. Jams. E-mail Tiffany@FabulousAlways.com to RSVP.

Soon to be fabulous is Edison Farrow's new Piano Man Wednesdays party at the new Crescendos Piano Bar at 113 Lincoln Rd., where from 8 p.m. until 1 a.m. there's no cover and live piano and singing by musicians flown in from all over the country. We were there last weekend and had a melodious time with pianist/singer Barry from Boston -- yes, that's his name -- whose menu of songs available for request was almost as extensive as the Cheesecake Factory menu. Sure, the whole thing is a little corny and campy, but consider it cruise ship chic. Plus, it's about time we got a piano bar, as much as we adore Magnum on the mainland. Located in the Di Lido Building at the Ritz Carlton South Beach, Crescendos features a piano built into a bar. Best of all, there are tambourines for those of us who love to channel Stevie Nicks during one of the jam sessions.

There may not be a piano at the jumping new Beer & Burger Joint in our quasi-warehouse district in the Purdy Avenue area, but in due time there will be live music -- notably jazz -- upstairs in the lounge, with comfy couches where bottle service is not a prerequisite if you feel like plunking down. If the only jazz you dig is the Utah Jazz, consider B&B's sports bar downstairs, featuring chalkboard walls for all you aspiring graffiti artists. We were stuffing our faces on their fabby burgers last Thursday night, and the place was mobbed. The local, casual, yet sceney vibe was a lovely accouterment to our skinny fries.

The MOCA Shakers -- the young, professional patrons of the Museum of Contemporary Art -- are emerging from the dark that was summer and launching their official season on Sept. 3 with a party at Viceroy's Club 50 for the annual Mystery Dates event. The glammy dinner parties at private homes of some of Miami's bona fide VIPs will take place on Nov. 7. The Happy Hour With a Cause will offer free Grey Goose cocktails from 7-9 p.m., when 5 percent of bar sales will go to MOCA.

The steakhouse formerly known as Manny's and now known as Miami's Chop House offers a slew of weekly events, including free oysters on Fridays, free champagne for the fairer sex on Saturdays and free wine tastings on Wednesdays, among other incentives. Info: 305-938-9000.

Mr. Chow at the W South Beach is also open for biz, and despite its squabbles with its Gansevoort South neighbor Philippe, it's a fancy and fabulous spot from which to see and be seen. Even if you aren't indulging in the pricey cuisine, a stop and sip at the restaurant's luxe bar is the equivalent of descending from a grand staircase before a big night out. Put the emphasis on ``before'' -- you wouldn't want to trip down that virtual staircase after a night out before all those fabulous, fancy folks, would you?

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