I became a vegetarian by default -- my girlfriend was one. But now that my girlfriend is my ex, I headed out to Chima Brazilian Steakhouse to renew my life as a carnivore.

The gauchos at Chima, (2400 E. Las Olas Blvd., Fort Lauderdale) will pile up your plate with sirloin, top sirloin, baby top sirloin, filet mignon, flank steak, beef ribs, sausage, lamb chops, chicken breast, pork ribs and more until you either explode or go into cardiac arrest.

This is just what I needed, an endless supply of beefy comfort food.

You know you've arrived at an upscale establishment when: 1. The valet parking is complimentary. 2. There are at least 200 patrons and there seems to be an equal amount of employees who are dressed like Brazilian cowboys but look like ninjas (albeit gracious ones) 3. The hand towels in the restrooms are velvety soft and imprinted with the nightspot's name. 4. You're the only one wearing flip-flops, cargo shorts and a New York Yankees T-shirt.

Thankfully, I wasn't the one in the Yankees shirt this time. I was sporting jeans and a button-down like most of the other guys. The women were dressed in slinky little numbers as if they were headed to an Academy Awards afterparty.

So how many servings of sausage did I eat? None. I chickened out. But you don't need to pig out on beef to enjoy yourself here.

It's extremely pleasant on the outdoor patio bar, illuminated by tiki torches and lights affixed to an overhanging, 100-year-old banyan tree. Plush cushions cover rattan furniture and you can tuck yourself into one as beautiful cocktail waitresses bring you drinks. For those who need a drink ASAP, stop by the satellite bar and order a mojito for yourself.

On Wednesday through Saturday nights, you can listen to live music on the patio. The alternating musicians play a mix of bossa nova and Brazilian jazz. I heard the duo of Jimena and Eduardo. Jimena effortlessly plays complicated patterns on her nylon string guitar and her voice is soft but sultry. Eduardo is a confident and extremely competent keyboardist who can spice up a song with a dazzling solo.

Inside, votive candles flicker atop the granite bar counter and a flat screen plays music DVD's (I stayed for awhile to watch U2's Rattle and Hum). A glass wall allows a view of the wine collection -- about a thousand bottles. The bar serves aged scotch, premium tequilas and pricey cognac and 21 signature cocktails. Try a Brazilian Love Affair, which is mixed with Leblon Cachaca, Alchemy Chocolate Vodka, Godiva Dark Chocolate Liqueur, Tezon Agave Nectar and fresh strawberries.

Chima is equally an excellent date destination and singles spot.

For vegans and vegetarians -- or anyone who wants a good meal -- Sublime Natural & Organic Restaurant & Bar A hip, health-minded clientele hangs here, surrounded by walls of flowing water, plenty of plants and Peter Max paintings. Sublime is romantic enough for a date or a meeting place for those on the prowl. I didn't have much luck -- but it may have been because my clothes smelled like steak.

I needed a break from my cultured evening, so I hit Premier Billiards & Sports Club, in Coral Springs (9120 Wiles Rd.)

You can establish that a place isn't upscale when: 1. A platinum blonde in a miniskirt is sauntering around selling shots. 2. Guys and gals are screaming about a bad call in a football game they're watching. 3. You're the only one wearing a button-down shirt. 4. The band is playing so loud you can barely hear the crowd screaming about football.

The band playing there was Free Radicals and they most certainly know how to let the Led out. The last time I heard a band play Led Zepp so fiercely, I was listening to a live Zeppelin album. They play at Premier once a month. You can check their list of gigs at www.myspace.com/TheFreeRadsRock.com.

Premier's 9,000 square feet is filled with pool tables, TVs, video games galore, dart boards and friendly locals. The club is celebrating its first anniversary Saturday night and rockers Loose Cannon will be on stage at 10 p.m.

You'll definitely see me there, air drumming along with the band and deliberating between a luscious hamburger and a boring salad.

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