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My Law License

• Marketing Yourself As The Lawyer (Coward) You Are

  Sometimes I wonder whether to write about the things that just make me embarrassed to be a lawyer. There are things so stunning, so pathetic, that I have trouble transferring thought to words.
  
  But this is something you need to know.
  
  While I have devoted much of the [...]
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• The Silver Bullet Of Legal Marketing, For Like When Tornadoes Kill People

  I have failed you all. I have spent my time here raging against the scumbag legal marketers who believe that the road to success as a lawyer is filling the internet with garbage - automatic twitter feeds, multiple accounts, ghostwritten blog posts about the latest car accident and who just [...]
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• They Couldn't Wait (An Angry Rant, With Profanity)

  As the 2011 holiday season grew closer, the social media and tech hacks got, as Elmer Fudd says, “bewy bewy qwyat.” Lawyers, real lawyers, turned their focus to family, travel, closing out their year, settling those last few cases, and the interest in buying into the salesmanship of former lawyers [...]
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• 2012: The Year Lawyers Become Great Through Lawyering, Not The Internet

  Analogize two new restaurants. One with a great website, pictures of the beautiful decor, private rooms and a great wine list, ability to make reservations online, and testimonials from customers like Julie R. and Bob W. It also has an active twitter account and Facebook fan page. "Like" them on [...]
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• A Generation Of Proud, Anonymous, Lawyers

  The debate over privacy is dead. It isn't really, but apparently, in order to be "cool" on the internet, you must declare something "dead." The debate over privacy though is dead, as there is no privacy on the internet, or in smart phones, and anyone who cries about it, is' [...]
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• The One Comment That Got To Me

  No, not those comments. I've been the subject of negative comments in print and online for longer than any social media hack has been working from home after their failed law career. I'm not talking about the anonymous online comments. Those generate laughter and some eye rolls, but I'm lucky' [...]
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• Does The North Carolina Bar Advocate Blogging About Accidents To Get Cases?

  One of the tried (tired) and true marketing methods used by cheesy personal injury lawyers is to blog about horrific accidents in order to get the Google attention they want and hope that the grieving family finds them on the internet and retains them so they can get their 40%.
  [...]
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• An Open Letter To Legal Marketing Conference Organizers: Dear Morons,

  It's getting pretty pathetic out there, and you, ALM, Lexis, and the other organizations serving the legal profession have been throwing together conferences for lawyers desperate to market themselves chocked full of a happy group of idiots as speakers.
  
  Failed lawyers, lawyers who haven't seen a client in [...]
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• The Tweet Heard 'Round The Social Media Marketing World

  Before the unemployed marketers found a way to sell it for a living, and convince lawyers that clients were going to line up with every online "tweet" or "status update," no one thought of creating a fake persona for the purpose of lying to get business. No one thought of [...]
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• How To Make Money As A Lawyer - Forget Law School

  A couple years ago my electrician showed up to my house in a BMW. A few days later he showed up in a Porsche. I asked who's Porsche it was, and he said "mine, the BMW is in the shop."
  
  Recently, there's been some discussion about this country developing [...]
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