Last weekend, I went to a college sorority reunion. I was amazed by the careers my female classmates had pursued -- lawyers, veterinarians, orthodontists, and accountants. As grads of the 80s, we asked the female students about their majors, their future careers. We assumed that even more of them would work in a larger variety of professions and in greater numbers.

It's all part of a profound change that seems to have snuck up on America. Now, for the first time in history, more than half of all U.S. workers are women. Even more, mothers are the primary breadwinners or co-breadwinners in nearly two-thirds of American families. It's a seismic shift expected to continue, and likely even accelerate as men lose their jobs in higher numbers and women earn the bulk of college degrees.

What are real guys saying about women overtaking them in the workplace? Are men happy to share the household financial burden or angry about the invasion of women at the office?

The answer, of course, depends on whom you ask. Some men noisily and bitterly have protested, interested in preserving certain workplace arenas as all-male havens. Others are comfortable with women pursuing careers, contributing to the bills and becoming part of work teams.

``Most American men simply continue to go about their lives, falling somewhere between eager embrace of women's equality and resigned acceptance,'' says Michael Kimmel as part of The Shriver Report, Has a Man's World Become a Woman's Nation?

I asked Steve Klinger of Miami how he feels about the findings of the Shriver Report, which calls America today, A Woman's Nation. Klinger, an out-of-work banker, says he's never known a workplace without women. In his current predicament, he's thankful for his wife's earnings, and her access to health insurance. In fact, his unemployment gave him a new appreciation for women whose earnings contribute to their families' income. ``We are lucky we have her salary to pay the bills.''

Kimmel, a sociologist who studies men and masculinity, scrutinized male attitudes toward the female advancement into American workplaces and discovered a generational divide: Younger men were much more accepting of female bosses and co-workers and gender equality in the workplace.

DON'T BE FOOLED

Remember, the dramatic movement of women out of traditional roles at home and into paid employment has happened amazingly fast, in just a 30-year time span.

But don't be fooled by the numbers. Women are half the workforce, but they're still the overwhelming majority of minimum-wage workers and they have yet to make significant headway into top posts in government and corporate America.

Brad Harrington, executive director of the Boston Center College for Work & Family, points out that 97 percent of Fortune 500 companies have male CEOs.

``As long as that's the case, the culture of organizations will always be biased toward the way men operate,'' Harrington says. ``That's not to say it will be hostile toward women, but it may not be as sensitive to women as it could be.''

Carl Schuster, a Fort Lauderdale attorney with Ruden McClosky for 47 years, has watched the evolution in his workplace. The women, he says, have brought changes, such as requiring the law firm to plan ahead for maternity leaves, creating confidentiality issues when spouses work at other firms, and initiating conversation about flexible work arrangements. Changes also include significant financial contribution by female lawyers. Schuster says, ``Clearly our workplace is a better place now.''

With a hearty stock of senior male partners, Schuster says women haven't overcome men at his firm, but he can see a day when it could happen: All five of the firm's summer associates were women.

`QUIET ACQUIESCENCE'

Harrington says women's full-scale entry into the labor force has made men more empathetic to work/life issues. He says some men even are following the path women have forged, asking for flexible work arrangements or turning down job transfers. Both genders are learning it's hard to combine a career and children and heated negotiations often are going on at home and work.

Kimmel says even with more female breadwinners, men don't identify in the workplace as fathers. ``Men need to say, `I want on-site child care.' '' Kimmel says. ``Right now, we have a quiet acquiescence to a very different world.''

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