''The first time I came I did all the exercise with the diet and I didn't lose a single pound. There's a man who's come here every year for the past 21 years; he says you have to stay at least 10 days to two weeks to actually lose weight.'' Deaton and her gang only stay a week. But she keeps coming back; this was visit No. 6.

Rosemary Owens of Dallas, who was lounging by the pool, has been visiting here since the mid-1990s with a crowd of fellow airline employees. ``It's lovely. It's affordable. They have beautiful service and food. You get a whole lot of bang for the buck. And the treatments are really good; each year they've improved.''

BATTLE OF BULGE

Owens said she didn't expect to lose weight -- this visit would last only four days -- but she was hoping to get back on a healthy track. Phyllis and I were hoping for the same; each of us was carrying more pounds than we'd like.

So each morning we started with a workout or aerobics or yoga class, followed by breakfast in the resort's spa restaurant of fresh fruit, cereals, fresh juices -- including a cactus diuretic that looked like pond scum but tasted OK -- and eggs cooked to order. No croissants or butter here; that was across the grounds in the ''regular'' restaurant. Eat reasonably, and you can consume less than 1,000 calories per day if you take all three meals in the spa restaurant -- though portion control is up to you.

Invariably, Phyllis and I were the last to leave, as we caught up on business and friends and books and shared the usually-secret joys and woes of family. ''Sometimes when you're away from home, you're willing talk about things you'd never discuss with people you see regularly,'' she says. So true.

We by-passed possible excursions -- Taxco for silver shopping, Cuenavaca for gardens -- in favor of a slow pace. By mid-morning, we were ready for shopping in the sweet town, scooping up silver jewelry and locally made face creams and clay piggy banks painted by the artist as we watched. Then it was lunch, reading -- one day a golf lesson -- and visits to the spa.

I was hesitant about the spa treatments, having had more than a few wimpy massages in my travels. But each -- some included in my package, some involving an extra fee -- rated very good to excellent. Firming facials, reflexology, deep massage, loofah, mani- and pedi-cure, scalp massage, and my favorites, a Thai massage and an aromatherapy -- left me feeling beautified and soothed. Many took place in the resort's new Holistic Spa, a serene space of high light ceilings and trickling pools that opened last December.

By evening, we dined -- though I admit, not always in the spa restaurant, and yes, we had the occasional margarita. But we'd been good all day, and that, we figured, should be good enough.

The four-day spa visit may not have cured all my woes, but by the time I headed back to reality, I was at least less savage. I can't say that I lost the first ounce or dramatically shifted my lifestyle. But months later, I'm still eating healthier than I was and getting more exercise than before my visit. My jeans are a little looser. And while I don't talk to Phyllis every day, or even every week, I know that the minute I call, we'll be right back where we were -- at least friendship-wise -- in Mexico.

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