Dear Carolyn: A recent column about family (http://wapo.st/1cDW9Nq) really hit home. For years I've been trying to make my relationship with my mom better, always hoping that if I just tried harder and did more she would love me and accept me. We've had some wonderful times but it's always been a roller coaster.
I finally hit rock bottom with her and feel like I need to let go of the mom I want her to be and accept her for who she is and grieve that loss, but make the most of what I do have. Any book recommendations? I will be pursuing therapy; I think it's a must.
I'm sorry for your disappointment, but it sounds as if you have a lot of good things ahead of you now —the inherent benefit in "rock bottom."
The first book I thought of was Anywhere but Here by Mona Simpson. A novel probably isn't the type of book you had in mind, but it's Difficult Mom Distancing immersion.
Another offbeat offering that I suspect will hit the spot is the movie Ruby in Paradise, starring a young Ashley Judd in the kind of role I wish she had stuck to. It's a pitch-perfect take on the transition from a life where others let you down to a life where you come through for yourself.