PRISM GLASSES

 

$12 (price may vary) plus shipping and handling from amazon.com

Suggested by Jon Harris of Christiansburg, Va.

These are special glasses that use an amazing scientific principle — possibly photosynthesis — to bend light beams at a 90-degree angle. This means that when you put these glasses on, instead of seeing what's in front of you, you're actually looking straight down. This means you can watch television while lying flat on your back, which can be very handy. Or say you're a guy, and you're talking to a woman who happens to have — as so many women do these days — breasts. You don't want to be caught looking at them, but you hear them calling out to you in breast language, which only guys can hear, saying: "Here we are! Down here! Don't you want to take a gander?" If you're wearing these glasses, you CAN take that gander, while appearing to be making eye contact, thanks to science!

If they ever make contact lenses that can do this, they'll sell MILLIONS.

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DAVE BARRY 2013 GIFT GUIDE

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