Dear Abby: As a father of two teenage daughters, I have a question about couples living together. Do relationships that start this way have a higher failure rate than those that don’t? What should be considered when a young girl has the “living together” question presented to her by a young man? And most important, what can I as a father do to help my daughters make an intelligent decision about this, other than just “load my shotgun” (LOL)?
Longtime fan in Ohio
It depends upon whether the couple living together are engaged to be married and their level of education. From what I’ve read, the higher the level of education, the more stable the couple will be. If the question is presented to your daughters, ideally you will have gotten to know the young man, and the relationship will have developed beyond the casual stage.
However, I cannot stress strongly enough the importance of your girls being independent, self-supporting and completing their education before they decide to do this. One of the most common reasons women remain in unhappy marriages/relationships is the fear they can’t survive on their own.
Dear Abby: My husband and I have three daughters, identical triplets. We, like many parents of multiples, are tired of questions and unsolicited comments from strangers concerning IVF — which we did not use, hence “identical” — or anything else triplet-related.
I don’t think people realize how rude they are being. I have been asked when did I know, how much did they weigh, what are their full names, etc.
Abby, would you please discuss baby etiquette with the world? I do not feel questions about my children from total strangers are appropriate.
Multiple Mom in Oklahoma
Identical triplets are unusual, and what the questioners are doing is exhibiting natural curiosity. A polite way to respond would be to say, “They were conceived with love.”