Scene in the Tropics

Politics, charity and freeloading at the Black bash

cheban & black
cheban & black

Philanthropist and The Real Housewives of Miami cast member Lea Black is a mad social scientist of sorts, fusing a motley crew into one big philanthropic Petri dish. Her latest concoction: Saturday night at the Fontainebleau at her and defense attorney husband Roy’s haute hootenanny to raise money for a cause bigger than all the egos in the ballroom — children.

And while we expected some people to act like children, the whole scene was surprisingly civilized and drama free. Sure, there were the grand camera-ready entrances of RHOM cast members Lisa Hochstein and Joanna Krupa, in attendance with their RHOM alum-who-got-away, dentist Karent Sierra. The rest of the RHOM stars were busy showing solidarity for each other and took their drama to the gay polo tournament in Wellington. Footage of both forthcoming, only by Bravo. There was also a handful of hilariously colorful women at the party who should have been cast on that show, especially the one who introduced herself to us saying, “I’m not a stripper. I’m not a hooker. I’m a socialite.”

But the grandest entrance was made by erstwhile cast member, drag queen Elaine Lancaster, who entered with long time BFF and recent, unofficial North Korean ambassador and Kim Jong-un idol Dennis Rodman. They were joined by former Miamian Lisa Pliner, who seemed to provide the larger than life Rodman with more than his fair share of amusement. Toto, we’re not in Pyongyang anymore.

Rodman spoke to us exclusively on his controversial trip to North Korea. “I have been contacted by the FBI, and I met with them. They wanted to know what went on and who’s really in charge in North Korea. I have been invited back to North Korea in August, and I want to go. I’m not a total idiot. I know what Kim Jong-un is threatening to do regarding his military muscle. I hope it doesn’t happen because America will take whatever actions to protect America and our allies. I do think, umm, you know, that we have to talk to people who want to cause us harm so hopefully they won’t. I’ve been talking to folks for years who don’t get what I’m about, but that’s cool, ’cause once they walk away they like me. I might be able to keep folks’ heads cool. We all going to find a way to get along and keep peace. Peace and love is where it is at, Lesley.”

Young Miami mixed with not so young Miami, and some famous visitors showed up — including Lance Bass and Kardashian appendage Jonathan Cheban, who talked to us about his aspirations to become the “next Simon Cowell,” because of his penchant for judging people — for a fun-filled night of selflessness despite the inevitable presence of a few party crashing freeloaders who were captured on camera not so surreptitiously lifting a VIP gift bag.

American Idol winner Taylor Hicks provided the dinner music, a mellow, bluesy mix of Doobie Brothers and Elton John, while local fave Flo Rida got the crowd — and some willing and able women — up off their feet, onto the stage and almost out of their clothes with a powerhouse show of his greatest hits.

So beyond the politics, baubles, Botox and ballers, how much was raised? “We’re still counting,” Lea Black told us. “It was a packed house of people partying until one in the morning. Between Taylor Hicks, Flo Rida, DJ Whi5ker5 and his incredible light show, and all the generosity, it was hands down one of the best parties yet.” We agree. In what universe would you ever expect to see Kim Jong-un in the same blog post as The Real Housewives, Taylor Hicks, Lance Bass and Flo Rida? Now that’s so Miami.

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