carolyn hax

Carolyn Hax: Readers advise on envy and friends with problems

 

While I’m away, readers give the advice

O n envying your friends’ success:

(1) Get rid of your TV — for mountains of reasons that become obvious when you think about it.

(2) Cultivate a few friends who value giving, and who believe living lightly on the earth is a better goal than acquiring.

(3) Focus on what you can do to make the world a better place.

I made the transition 30 years ago and still wake up with a smile every morning.

D.

On having friends disappear on you:

Folks who are feeling miffed about plans being canceled, emails going unanswered or friends acting funny, please consider they may have something going on in their lives bigger than you, and it’s OK, the friendship is still there.

This smacked me upside the head recently. A friend was acting moody, and I later learned his wife had a miscarriage. Another friend FINALLY showed up for a night with the gang, and he emailed later to thank us since he’s been dealing with his ailing father, which we had no idea about. Their struggles are not my business until they’re ready to talk about them, and it doesn’t mean they value my friendship any less.

Unmiffed

(

Read more Lifestyle stories from the Miami Herald

  • What do you recommend?

    “The Luminaries by Eleanor Catton — it’s a book built around characters and plots inspired by astrological principles. It’s a neo-Victorian murder mystery and a mere 832 pages long, and it made 28-year-old Catton the youngest person to win the coveted Man Booker Prize. The voice is natural, easy to understand and ambitious; she’s a novelist who is seeking to reclaim the authorial, a writer who seeks to entertain and enlighten.”

  •  
 <span class="cutline_leadin">The Boom:</span> How Fracking Ignited the American Energy Revolution and Changed the World. Russell Gold. Simon & Schuster. 384 pages. $26.

    Nonfiction

    Book considers the pros and cons of fracking

    Author considers both sides of the controversial issue.

  • Southern Cross Stargazer for April 20-26

    By nightfall Spica follows fiery Mars, in Virgo, higher in the east. Telescopes reveal the white ice cap shrinking in the Martian summer and subtle dark details on the iron-rich red Martian desert. Binoculars enhance the planet’s bright color. Mars sets in the west about dawn and will remain bright for a few weeks.

Miami Herald

Join the
Discussion

The Miami Herald is pleased to provide this opportunity to share information, experiences and observations about what's in the news. Some of the comments may be reprinted elsewhere on the site or in the newspaper. We encourage lively, open debate on the issues of the day, and ask that you refrain from profanity, hate speech, personal comments and remarks that are off point. Thank you for taking the time to offer your thoughts.

The Miami Herald uses Facebook's commenting system. You need to log in with a Facebook account in order to comment. If you have questions about commenting with your Facebook account, click here.

Have a news tip? You can send it anonymously. Click here to send us your tip - or - consider joining the Public Insight Network and become a source for The Miami Herald and el Nuevo Herald.

Hide Comments

This affects comments on all stories.

Cancel OK

  • Marketplace

Today's Circulars

  • Quick Job Search

Enter Keyword(s) Enter City Select a State Select a Category