Dear Abby

Dear Abby: Man’s online porn addiction robs marriage of its passion

 

Dear Abby: My husband is addicted to online porn. Our sex life has suffered massively because of it.

My woman’s intuition told me there had to be a reason for him turning to porn, so I checked our computer’s history log and found he has been surfing gay porn. He does watch straight porn, but now peppers it with male-on-male porn as well.

It has shattered my world. I don’t know what to think or what to do. I can’t discuss this with my family. They would never view him in the same way again. Help!

J. in Brighton, England

Your husband may be curious, bisexual or have discovered (late) that he is gay. You need to have a frank conversation with him. Remain calm, stay strong and remember that you, too, are entitled to a sex life. You have nothing to lose by discussing this, and everything to gain.

If you need more help afterward, consider going online and contacting the Straight Spouse Network at www.straightspouse.org.

Dear Abby: I have been in therapy for four years. I like my therapist, who has helped me immensely. However, over the past year she has become increasingly tardy in keeping her appointments.

I understand there are sometimes emergencies, but being a half-hour late every week is excessive. I feel it is disrespectful to me. She keeps saying I just don’t understand.

How can I get across to her how frustrated I am? Or do I need to find a new therapist?

By the clock in Connecticut

Tell your therapist how this is affecting you and ask what HER problem is. She owes you an explanation.

I agree that being late for your appointment is disrespectful if it happens regularly. You may need to find another therapist. If that’s the case, be sure to tell her why you are leaving.

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