Dear Abby: My boyfriend and his 4-year-old daughter live with me and my two children. We keep our finances separate. I am self-employed and work mostly from home. I also take care of the household chores.

My problem is that he thinks because I work from home I should take care of his daughter during the day, versus her going to day care. My schedule is very full, and I enjoy being able to work from home without the interruptions of having to play nanny while my children are in school. However, I feel guilty about not helping him out on this.

Am I selfish for not helping him, or am I justified in my feelings?

Don’t want to be the Nanny

If you need the income from your business, that’s where you should be directing your energy. Your job, coupled with the housework, is enough to handle.

Your boyfriend is employed, and he can place the 4-year-old in day care during the hours your children are in school.

Dear Abby: Charlie and I have been married 14 years. Between 1970 and 1980, he traveled with a big circus. He says those were the best years of his life.

We have taken several cruises together and other nice trips, but he never mentions them. It’s always his circus days that he talks about.

I have asked him several times not to bring the subject up so much. Is there anything I can say to make him stop? It’s driving me crazy.

Bored under the big top

I’m sure your husband doesn’t mean to belittle the good times you have had together. But his circus adventure ended 30 years ago. What I suspect Charlie is reminiscing about is less the circus than it is his youth.

Try this the next time he mentions the subject: Remind him that you have already heard the story.