• Progress is being reported in the two-month-old NHL lockout. Apparently, both sides have agreed they both look like idiots for not ending this sooner.
• As Jimmie Johnson moves in on another NASCAR season title at Homestead next week, Kevin Harvick saw his car damaged when a prerace parachute diver veered onto pit row. Bulletin to sporting events: The only people fascinated by skydiving are skydivers.
• A horse named Fort Larned won the Breeders Cup at Santa Anita in Arcadia, Calif., to immediately establish itself as a leading contender to disappoint everybody in the Triple Crown races.
• Ronda Rousey has become the first female to join UFC, which is scouting for other females to fight her. Too bad. I think she should fight men. Plenty of women dominate and completely control men. The word for that is “marriage.”
• The Key West Super Boat World Championships are going on despite the deaths of three drivers in last year’s race. Cigarette boats might be the only thing worse for your health than cigarettes.
• Cops broke up a gambling ring run by Broward youth coaches betting on Pee Wee football. (Update: the line on the Wildcats game has dropped from minus-8 to minus-4 due to the starting quarterback being grounded for sassing his mom.)
• Hidden injuries, switched jersey numbers, intentionally deflated footballs. When USC said they wanted coach Lane Kiffin to set an example, I guess they should have specified what kind of example.
• Soccer superstar Lionel Messi’s girlfriend gave birth to a boy. The infant is currently fourth in the Spanish league in scoring.
• Parting thought: It was announced Danica Patrick would appear in two new Super Bowl ads, extending her all-time lead in ratio of Super Bowl ads to winning anything.
Visit Greg’s Random Evidence of a Cluttered Blog daily at MiamiHerald.com, watch video at YouTube/TheGregCote and follow on Twitter @gregcote.