What parent hasn’t, at one time or another, felt a boiling rage, a need to lash out at the object of so much love and effort? What parent hasn’t resorted to desperate measures to reach a sullen, ungrateful, rebellious teen?

I suspect Tommy Jordan is that kind of parent. The North Carolina father became a YouTube sensation after he lectured his 15-year-old daughter and then shot her laptop on camera. Check out his eight-minute video — almost 23 million people have, as of this writing. Watching it may remind you how parenting can send the most even-tempered among us over the edge.

And before the “experts” send impassioned emails about teachable moments and keeping one’s cool, play Jordan’s video a few times and note the anguish, frustration and disappointment in his voice. On more than one occasion, he has to stop to regain his composure.

The fiasco, as Jordan calls it, began when he discovered his daughter’s Facebook post while he was upgrading her laptop with new software — a task that took him hours, by the way. In a snooty, profanity-laced complaint titled “To My Parents,” Hannah grumbles on Facebook about all the chores she has and how she ought to get paid for doing them. She insults the adults in her family and warns them she won’t stick around to help them when they’re old. And she whines that she can’t balance her schoolwork with her chores.

Sound familiar? For me it sure does. My children, now grown, even used the same word Hannah did — slave — as if they understood its true meaning.

Apparently, Hannah had been grounded for a similar incident and hadn’t learned her lesson, so Jordan, an IT consultant, decided to kick up the discipline a notch. He filmed himself reading her post and commenting on it. In the video he also talks about his own hardscrabble childhood. Then he sets the upgraded laptop in the grass and tells the camera, “That right there is your laptop. This right here is my .45” and fires off nine shots.

He uploaded the video, “Facebook Parenting: For the Troubled Teen,” to his profile as well as his daughter’s. It also appeared on YouTube along with a link to the Facebook thread and a final written message: “Maybe a few kids can take something away from this. … If you’re so disrespectful to your parents and yourself as to post this kind of thing on Facebook, you’re deserving of some tough love.”

Not surprisingly, hundreds of thousands have commented. Others have posted their own videos. Child Protective Services has shown up on his doorstep, and Jordan has conceded that the video — and the shooting — was not “a good example of me as a father.” I would agree. The video (so public), the gun (so violent) are not good choices.

Yet, I understand exactly how Tommy Jordan feels, how desperate, how angry, how helpless. As a parent, I’ve questioned my role, my methods of discipline, my children’s disobedience and defiance — my very ability to guide them. I’ve been known to pinch, to yank, to holler, to tear through drawers and closets and read diary entries. Yes, I most definitely feel Jordan’s frustration.

So he may have been a bit over the top with his method. But his message? Right on the mark. Hear, hear, for tough love.

Follow Ana on Twitter @AnaVeciana.