Emergency Brassiere Face Mask


$29.99 plus shipping and handling from www.ebbra.com.

Suggested by Walter Janowski of Milford, Mich.

This is the perfect gift for the lady on your holiday list who (1) has breasts, and (2) does not wish to die from inhaling bad things. The Emergency Bra, which was designed by Dr. Elena Bodnar, a female scientist, is a brassiere that, according to the website, "is like any other conventional bra in terms of its main function of supporting the breasts." But in an emergency, it can be removed and used as two face masks.

Is that a great idea, or what? We believe that Dr. Bodnar should receive the Nobel Prize for Lingerie. We also believe that this would be a far safer world if every woman wore the Emergency Bra. Granted, you’d have men constantly yelling: "This is an emergency! Take off your brassiere!" But they’d get bored and stop after a couple of decades.

Next gift: The Pillow Tie


Read more Dave Barry Gift Guide stories from the Miami Herald


    It's a difficult question that every pet owner must face, sooner or later: How do we memorialize our beloved animal companions after they have gone to that big Pet Supermarket in the sky?


    Why does your chicken need a diaper?


    $11.09 (price may vary) plus shipping and handling from amazon.com

Miami Herald

Join the

The Miami Herald is pleased to provide this opportunity to share information, experiences and observations about what's in the news. Some of the comments may be reprinted elsewhere on the site or in the newspaper. We encourage lively, open debate on the issues of the day, and ask that you refrain from profanity, hate speech, personal comments and remarks that are off point. Thank you for taking the time to offer your thoughts.

The Miami Herald uses Facebook's commenting system. You need to log in with a Facebook account in order to comment. If you have questions about commenting with your Facebook account, click here.

Have a news tip? You can send it anonymously. Click here to send us your tip - or - consider joining the Public Insight Network and become a source for The Miami Herald and el Nuevo Herald.

Hide Comments

This affects comments on all stories.

Cancel OK

  • Marketplace

Today's Circulars

  • Quick Job Search

Enter Keyword(s) Enter City Select a State Select a Category