Hand-Crank Siren

 
BOB EIGHMIE / FOR THE HERALD /

$99.99 plus shipping and handling from Kotula’s, 1850 Banks Rd., Fort Mill, S.C. 29715, 800-685-4845; www.kotulas.com

This is the ultimate gift for the person on your list who is concerned about personal safety, or simply enjoys attracting attention. This is a hand-cranked siren that, once you get it really cranking, can be heard a quarter of a mile away. It’s completely portable, weighing no more than a standard food processor and fitting easily into any purse large enough to carry a siren of this size. You can use it to repel a would-be mugger by either cranking the siren, or simply bludgeoning him senseless.

The siren also makes a great conversation piece. Say you’re at a restaurant with some iPhone owners who are — because this is what iPhone people do — demanding that you marvel at their latest "apps." Imagine their envious looks when you haul out this baby and start cranking it. Their iPhones cannot top that! And if they can, you can smash them with your siren.

Back to Main Page

DAVE BARRY 2010 GIFT GUIDE

Read more Dave Barry Gift Guide stories from the Miami Herald

  • PET MONUMENT

    It's a difficult question that every pet owner must face, sooner or later: How do we memorialize our beloved animal companions after they have gone to that big Pet Supermarket in the sky?

  • CHICKEN DIAPERS

    Why does your chicken need a diaper?

  • CAT LADY ACTION FIGURE

    $11.09 (price may vary) plus shipping and handling from amazon.com

Miami Herald

Join the
Discussion

The Miami Herald is pleased to provide this opportunity to share information, experiences and observations about what's in the news. Some of the comments may be reprinted elsewhere on the site or in the newspaper. We encourage lively, open debate on the issues of the day, and ask that you refrain from profanity, hate speech, personal comments and remarks that are off point. Thank you for taking the time to offer your thoughts.

The Miami Herald uses Facebook's commenting system. You need to log in with a Facebook account in order to comment. If you have questions about commenting with your Facebook account, click here.

Have a news tip? You can send it anonymously. Click here to send us your tip - or - consider joining the Public Insight Network and become a source for The Miami Herald and el Nuevo Herald.

Hide Comments

This affects comments on all stories.

Cancel OK

  • Marketplace

Today's Circulars

  • Quick Job Search

Enter Keyword(s) Enter City Select a State Select a Category