ALEC BALDWIN: The actor is set to quit Hollywood. Just like he was set to leave the country if Bush won the presidency.

NICOLE RICHIE: The starlet is in plans for a sitcom. It's called Unmarried with Children.

ASHLEE SIMPSON: After getting sacked from Melrose Place, the singer went to do Chicago on Broadway. That ought to bring out the NYC masses in wintertime.

KATIE HOLMES: Tom Cruise's wife defended putting her 3-year-old in high heels. She held the press conference while feeding her daughter cupcakes for dinner.

ADAM LAMBERT: The glam shock rocker says he was fat as a child, leading to his need for attention. That's the best excuse you can give for walking a person around on a leash?

THE SALAHIS: A glamorous wannabe couple infiltrated the inner sanctum of the White House at a State Dinner. Call it Gatecrashergate.

TIGER WOODS: The golfer's indiscretions may lose him many lucrative endorsements. But, hey, there's always Trojans.

SUSAN BOYLE: Britain's Got Talent breakout star achieved the highest first-day sales of the year in the U.K. with her new record I Dreamed A Dream. All that, with no leash!